Anonymous: Crack!Fic: Castle discovers Kate's guilty secret - her version of the Sims, complete with their characters beng together. Pre couple.


It’s not his fault the guy from the phone company is running late. It’s not her fault either. But she did ask him to come over and sit in her apartment today, and he forgot his laptop, and he doesn’t feel like reading any of her books for longer than three minutes.

There are a lot of books.

But there is also her computer, the white sleep light slowing winking at him, goading him into action. Into doing something he may regret. Like watching porn.

Except, the guy from the phone company is coming to fix the internet. So… so why is Beckett’s computer on sleep mode?

He reaches to touch the space bar but withdraws his hand. There could be consequences to looking at her computer. He doesn’t want to see the business end of her gun.

But still…

He touches the space bar.

The screen awakes, not to a password request but the pause screen of a game. He peers a little closer, eyes locked on the screen as he manoeuvres himself into the desk chair, trying to figure out what it is. What could hold Katherine Beckett’s attention so fully that she would press ‘pause’ and not ‘quit’. And then he sees the green jewels and it clicks.

Kate plays The Sims.

His eyes widen as he gasps in disbelief. Not that she’d play a computer game – that she’d have time to play one in the first place is amazing – but that of all of the games she could choose from, she’s clearly bingeing on The Sims. No one leaves it paused to go to work. No one.

Except Kate, clearly.

He moves the cursor to the twinkles around the ‘resume game’ button and clicks without hesitation. His curiosity will be the end of him one day, his mother has always said, but when there’s a mystery to solve, and that mystery is part of the greater mythos of Kate Beckett, he’s like a bloodhound called Betty with a nose for the faintest of scents.

The tableau on the screen before him is of a picture perfect family, a woman with chocolate skin, sleek black hair and bright clothes, an olive-skinned man with what looks like a five o’clock shadow who wears a polo shirt and jeans, and a cute toddler running around in the garden who looks to be a mixture of them both. Rick smiles and clicks on the woman, looks around the screen to find the status bars that indicate her moods, blinking in surprise when he sees the name ‘Lanie Esposito’ on there. He clicks on the man and finds he’s ‘Javier Esposito’. The kid’s called Antonio. He shakes his head in amazement before frantically trying to find where the rest of the people in this Sims town live.

He finds Kevin and Jenny next, their four kids all ginger and fair, with two dogs and three cats to look after too. The sight leaves him grinning, knowing this scenario would make Ryan a very happy, if rather tired, man. Those two are going to be great parents one day.

Before he can get caught up in the fairy tale his mind is concocting, he wonders if Kate has made a version of herself. He goes looking around the town but can’t find a house with a pixelated version of her face bobbing above it. He does find one that looks a bit like him though, and he clicks on it. When it’s loaded, the vision before him takes his breath away because the green jewel has landed by default on Kate.

Kate Castle.

He never knew he wanted that until right this second. He wants to marry her someday. They haven’t even got close to thinking about being anything more than co-workers but he knows he wants to marry her. And seeing this version of them, with three cute kids and a dog, in a house with a leafy backyard and a white picket fence? This has set that desire in stone.

He moves the cursor to the Sim version of him and the pop up gives suggestions of actions Sim-Kate could carry out with Sim-Rick. He likes the sound of ‘hug’ and ‘dance’, also ‘kiss hand’ and ‘chat’. But there’s another one there that he doesn’t remember the meaning behind.

“What is ‘WooHoo’?” he whispers to the screen.

He hovers the cursor over it, debating whether he wants to know or not. A loud knocking at the front door startles him and the mouse clicks. The Sims twirl around, most of their clothes magically disappearing until their underwear-clad bodies disappear behind a pixelated circle. Rick’s eyebrows rise in realisation and he laughs.

He gathers himself together and goes to let the guy from the phone company into the apartment before sitting back down at the computer in time to see a congratulatory pop-up.

Rick and Kate are pregnant!

“Oh, shit.”

What makes life valuable is that it doesn’t last forever, what makes it precious is that it ends. I know that now more than ever. And I say it today of all days to remind us that time is luck. So don’t waste it living someone else’s life, make yours count for something. Fight for what matters to you, no matter what. Because even if you fall short, what better way is there to live?


1. Don’t try to piss quietly. Nobody in a public restroom thinks you’re knitting in your stall. They came to piss, just like you. And if you have to take a dump, do it. Get over your fear of public toilets. It’ll make life a lot easier.

2. Masturbate. Masturbate a lot. Talk about it with your friends. You’ve got the right to make yourself feel good and brag about it just like all the boys with extra large kleenex packages on their desks.

3. If you want the large fries, get the large fries. Hunger and appetite are nothing to be ashamed of, just human. Don’t ever feel guilty for eating in front of others. You need to nourish your body to stay alive. We all do.

4. Laugh as loud as you have to, no matter if you snort or gasp or literally scream.

5. Fart when you have to.

6. Always remember you weren’t born to visually please others. Forget the phrase “what if they think it’s ugly”. If you think it’s lovely, it is lovely. You wanna wear it, wear it!

7. Speak your mind! You can learn to do so without insulting others or shoving your opinion down other people’s throats.


Seven Simple Ways To Free Yourself, from girl to girl (via cutely-perverted)

on the ice bucket challenge


my dad died from ALS when i was 3 years old. he was 36. my mom was 33. that was 30 years ago. now i’m the same age my mom was when my dad died. and there is still no cure for ALS. 

this is what happens when you have ALS: your muscles slowly stop working, one part at a time. for my dad, first he couldn’t use one of his hands. then his arm. then the other arm. then he couldn’t walk. then he couldn’t stand up. then he couldn’t talk. then he couldn’t swallow. then he couldn’t breathe. then he was dead.

this all took about two years. he was diagnosed when i was about one year old. the only memories i have about my dad are of an inert body in a wheelchair or lying in a bed with a bunch of tubes stuck into it. as i was learning to talk, he was losing the ability to speak. as i was learning to walk, he stopped being able to move. my mom often had to choose between who she was going to help go to the bathroom at any given moment: her husband or her toddler.

after my dad died, my mom took over the philadelphia chapter of the ALS association. it consisted of a shoebox full of notecards with names on it. now it is a multi-million dollar organization with a large staff. she is still in charge. my mom is one of the most amazing people on the planet, basically.

these past couple weeks have been mind-boggling. i have openly wept watching so many of these videos. i still don’t completely get how all of this has happened, but now we live in a world in which lil wayne and taylor swift and oprah and justin timberlake and weird al and bill gates talk about ALS. my mom just emailed me this sentence: “lebron james ice bucket challenge.” i mean, IS THIS REAL LIFE?! i just keep saying over and over: holy shit. holy shit. holy shit.

so far, it has raised over 10 million dollars… and counting. my mom has spent every single day of her life for the past three decades trying to get this kind of attention and funds for this disease.

i don’t care if it’s a stupid gimmick. i don’t care if people are just doing this because it’s trendy or because they want pats on the back. i don’t care if it’s the new harlem shake. i don’t care if for the rest of my life, when i talk about ALS, i have to say “you know, the ice bucket disease.”

please, everybody, please keep pouring buckets of ice over your heads. please keep donating money. please keep talking about this.

my mom’s chapter:



IF YOU DON’T THINK STEVE ROGERS IS A GOOD CHARACTER I’M GONNA EXplain why I think your opinion is wrong without being disrespectful or violent because steve wouldn’t want anyone acting that way especially on his behalf